The king of analogies

by Katie on August 14, 2013

No joke, if there is any skill Brandon has, it is in his ability to make outlandish analogies at the drop of a hat. A skill that is often quite humorous.

It may even be one of the things I like about him. Maybe.

So, reverting back to the whole candy bar debate, I purchased some for him Monday.

Of the available selection in the “fun size” candy bars, I purchased Twix, Almond Joy and Milky Way Simply Caramel. All of which I thought to be excellent choices for him. Twix and Almond Joy were (what I thought to be) his favorites, and I knew he liked Milky Way, so I thought the Simply Caramel option would be beyond perfect.

But alas, of course, I was wrong. Once again.

The next morning, when he was showing me the combined seven bars he had left (That is fact, not exaggeration. Boy likes his candy bars.), he made mention that the Twix bars were the only good ones.

“What!? You’re kidding! I thought you would love all of them. I can’t win.”

And that is when he launched into one of his prize-winning analogy speeches…


“You see, it’s like this:  let’s say we have a prime rib and a ribeye right here. And over here, way to the right, there’s a flank steak. Now, is a flank steak good on its own? You bet. Will I happily eat the flank steak? Sure. But when you put that flank steak next to the prime rib and the ribeye, it doesn’t even compare. Twix are ribeyes. The others are flank steaks.”


When you put it like that, I guess I should just be glad I didn’t purchase any hamburger steaks.


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